** I'm writing directly to you from now on. If and when you get a sibling, I will write directly to you both. I prefer this personalized format much better. **
Today, we cleaned and organized your toy room, lego-land bridge area, bedroom and closet. You did really well helping me sort a billion legos into their correct bins, choosing which clothes you would like to keep, and trying on jeans to see which you've outgrown. You never complained once, and we cleaned for hours. You even asked me if there was anything you could do well after I dismissed you to play while I worked out the final touches. You're so considerate and sweet. I am proud of your hard work!
We also went into town for your dermetologist appointment. Your only two moles have been on watch for years and it's time to have them removed. One of them is a bother and the other is a concern. Your dermatologist was very considerate of your feelings on the matter. It was nice of him to tell you that the reason he was asking how you felt about them is because he respects your opinion. We made the appointment to return and have them taken off. It is never fun to have any kind of surgery, no matter how minor, but this brings relief knowing these moles will not be a problem anymore in the future.
After that appointment, we went shopping for school supplies. This was the first "school supply" list we've ever fulfilled, and knowing it could also be the last, I made sure to enjoy it for all it was worth. It was so fun to watch you pick out your stuff. I should have known that you would want all black and grey for colors. If those weren't color options, you chose blue or red. We also picked up a pair of black and grey tennis shoes for you.
You talked about some of the things you are worried about in going to school. Mostly you are afraid you won't be smart enough, and that no one will like you. I assured you that most kids are a little scared about going back to school even when they've been there before, and that it's normal for you to be nervous. As for how smart you are, I have tried to explain to you that you're academically very well equipped for fourth grade public school. I can't seem to convince you though. You'll just have to see for yourself. With your standardized test scores placing you between 5th and 12th+ grade, you're the only one worried. ;)
I reminded you that God called us to do this as a family, and that sometimes we don't like or want what He asks of us - the way Moses didn't like what God called him to do with Pharaoh, and Jonah didn't want to go to Nineveh. But that we can always trust that it will be for His good purpose, and that he will guide and protect us if we walk in His will. Our obedience will bring blessings, and all we have to do is listen, follow, and watch God do amazing things. I wrote Jeremiah 29:11 on the chalkboard for you, and we went over it.
"'For I know the plans I have for you,’ declares the , ‘plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.'"
Once in a while I get a little nervous about how I'm going to feel dropping you off the first few days - watching you walk - letting go of something that has always been ours until now. I don't worry about you. I know you will love school. Maybe even a little too much. And I don't feel sad to see you spend the days away from me. It will be good for you. But Homeschool. Loosing Homeschool for this year… I've said it 1000 times, Homeschooling has been the greatest, most fulfilling thing I've ever done. And not to have that, with you, this year, will be tough for me. I'm sure.
On the other hand, I remember when Miss Emily's, Theo came piling in the door from school while we were visiting years ago. She and I unloaded his backpack of worksheets and remnants of his day while he settled in for some playing. I LOVED it so much. I thought for a second how fun it would be. And I love when you come home from summer school for the same reason.
I can't wait to hear all about your days, your friends, teachers, classes, see what you are learning about, spy on your homework-doing, unload your backpack! I SO want to be able to come with you to school, maybe as a fly so I wouldn't embarrass you. :)
I'm very excited for the fun little changes this will bring to our lives, even with some of the challenges it will present. I feel ready for it all!!!